Tuesday, December 17, 2002

Judging. Dalia Lithwick has a thoughtful essay about the personal aspects of judging in this morning's NY Times. I've never been a big Lithwick fan, but in this she eschews her normal breezy style to reflect on judging and "personal truths."

Where she misses is classifying Justice Thomas' point an "emotional outburst." In her Slate commentary last week on the oral arguments she already noted the giddiness of the proceedings, with the Chief Justice away recovering from surgery. In fact she used the analogy of students in a classroom with a substitute teacher. Accordingly, Justice Thomas' comments seem to be nothing more than a return to sobriety -- the principal walking in on the class. (Similarly, I disagree with her observation: "what Justice Thomas did is unforgivable; by hijacking the argument into the murk of personal experience, he did violence to the disinterested, lucid distance necessary for justice to be achieved.")

The subject is an intriguing one -- Lithwick's Dowdian contempt for Clarence Thomas defeats her attempt to look at the subject however. My own favorite essay is by Justice Frankfurter written about a flag-salute that can only be described today as Nazi-like in the case West Virginia State Board of Education v. Barnette, 319 U.S. 624 (1943). His dissent:
One who belongs to the most vilified and persecuted minority in history is not likely to be insensible to the freedoms guaranteed by our Constitution. Were my purely personal attitude relevant, I should wholeheartedly associate myself with the general libertarian views in the Court's opinion, representing, as they do, the thought and [p*647] action of a lifetime. But, as judges, we are neither Jew nor Gentile, neither Catholic nor agnostic. We owe equal attachment to the Constitution, and are equally bound by our judicial obligations whether we derive our citizenship from the earliest or the latest immigrants to these shores. As a member of this Court, I am not justified in writing my private notions of policy into the Constitution, no matter how deeply I may cherish them or how mischievous I may deem their disregard. The duty of a judge who must decide which of two claims before the Court shall prevail, that of a State to enact and enforce laws within its general competence or that of an individual to refuse obedience because of the demands of his conscience, is not that of the ordinary person. It can never be emphasized too much that one's own opinion about the wisdom or evil of a law should be excluded altogether when one is doing one's duty on the bench. The only opinion of our own even looking in that direction that is material is our opinion whether legislators could, in reason, have enacted such a law. In the light of all the circumstances, including the history of this question in this Court, it would require more daring than I possess to deny that reasonable legislators could have taken the action which is before us for review. Most unwillingly, therefore, I must differ from my brethren with regard to legislation like this. I cannot bring my mind to believe that the "liberty" secured by the Due Process Clause gives this Court authority to deny to the State of West Virginia the attainment of that which we all recognize as a legitimate legislative end, namely, the promotion of good citizenship, by employment of the means here chosen.

Not so long ago, we were admonished that

the only check upon our own exercise of power is our own sense of self-restraint. For the removal of unwise laws from the statute books, appeal lies not to the courts, but to the ballot and to the processes of democratic government. [p*648]

United States v. Butler, 297 U.S. 1 , 79 (dissent). We have been told that generalities do not decide concrete cases. But the intensity with which a general principle is held may determine a particular issue, and whether we put first things first may decide a specific controversy.

The admonition that judicial self-restraint alone limits arbitrary exercise of our authority is relevant every time we are asked to nullify legislation. The Constitution does not give us greater veto power when dealing with one phase of "liberty" than with another, or when dealing with grade school regulations than with college regulations that offend conscience, as was the case in Hamilton v. Regents, 293 U.S. 245. In neither situation is our function comparable to that of a legislature, or are we free to act as though we were a super-legislature. Judicial self-restraint is equally necessary whenever an exercise of political or legislative power is challenged. There is no warrant in the constitutional basis of this Court's authority for attributing different roles to it depending upon the nature of the challenge to the legislation. Our power does not vary according to the particular provision of the Bill of Rights which is invoked. The right not to have property taken without just compensation has, so far as the scope of judicial power is concerned, the same constitutional dignity as the right to be protected against unreasonable searches and seizures, and the latter has no less claim than freedom of the press or freedom of speech or religious freedom. In no instance is this Court the primary protector of the particular liberty that is invoked. This Court has recognized what hardly could be denied, that all the provisions of the first ten Amendments are "specific" prohibitions, United States v. Carolene Products Co., 304 U.S. 144 , 152 , n. 4. But each specific Amendment, insofar as embraced within the Fourteenth Amendment, must be equally respected, and the function of this [p*649] Court does not differ in passing on the constitutionality of legislation challenged under different Amendments.

When Mr. Justice Holmes, speaking for this Court, wrote that

it must be remembered that legislatures are ultimate guardians of the liberties and welfare of the people in quite as great a degree as the courts,

Missouri, K. & T. Ry. Co. v. May, 194 U.S. 267, 270, he went to the very essence of our constitutional system and the democratic conception of our society. He did not mean that for only some phases of civil government this Court was not to supplant legislatures and sit in judgment upon the right or wrong of a challenged measure. He was stating the comprehensive judicial duty and role of this Court in our constitutional scheme whenever legislation is sought to be nullified on any ground, namely, that responsibility for legislation lies with legislatures, answerable as they are directly to the people, and this Court's only and very narrow function is to determine whether, within the broad grant of authority vested in legislatures, they have exercised a judgment for which reasonable justification can be offered.

The framers of the federal Constitution might have chosen to assign an active share in the process of legislation to this Court. They had before them the well known example of New York's Council of Revision, which had been functioning since 1777. After stating that "laws inconsistent with the spirit of this constitution, or with the public good, may be hastily and unadvisedly passed," the state constitution made the judges of New York part of the legislative process by providing that "all bills which have passed the senate and assembly shall, before they become laws," be presented to a Council, of which the judges constituted a majority, "for their revisal and consideration." Art. III, New York Constitution of 1777. Judges exercised this legislative function in New York [p*650] for nearly fifty years. See Art. I, § 12, New York Constitution of 1821. But the framers of the Constitution denied such legislative powers to the federal judiciary. They chose instead to insulate the judiciary from the legislative function. They did not grant to this Court supervision over legislation.

The reason why, from the beginning, even the narrow judicial authority to nullify legislation has been viewed with a jealous eye is that it serves to prevent the full play of the democratic process. The fact that it may be an undemocratic aspect of our scheme of government does not call for its rejection or its disuse. But it is the best of reasons, as this Court has frequently recognized, for the greatest caution in its use.

The precise scope of the question before us defines the limits of the constitutional power that is in issue. The State of West Virginia requires all pupils to share in the salute to the flag as part of school training in citizenship. The present action is one to enjoin the enforcement of this requirement by those in school attendance. We have not before us any attempt by the State to punish disobedient children or visit penal consequences on their parents. All that is in question is the right of the State to compel participation in this exercise by those who choose to attend the public schools.

We are not reviewing merely the action of a local school board. The flag salute requirement in this case comes before us with the full authority of the State of West Virginia. We are, in fact, passing judgment on "the power of the State as a whole." Rippey v. Texas, 193 U.S. 504, 509; Skiriotes v. Florida, 313 U.S. 69, 79. Practically, we are passing upon the political power of each of the forty-eight states. Moreover, since the First Amendment has been read into the Fourteenth, our problem is precisely the same as it would be if we had before us an Act of Congress for the District of Columbia. To suggest that we are here concerned [p*651] with the heedless action of some village tyrants is to distort the augustness of the constitutional issue and the reach of the consequences of our decision.

Under our constitutional system, the legislature is charged solely with civil concerns of society. If the avowed or intrinsic legislative purpose is either to promote or to discourage some religious community or creed, it is clearly within the constitutional restrictions imposed on legislatures, and cannot stand. But it by no means follows that legislative power is wanting whenever a general nondiscriminatory civil regulation, in fact, touches conscientious scruples or religious beliefs of an individual or a group. Regard for such scruples or beliefs undoubtedly presents one of the most reasonable claims for the exertion of legislative accommodation. It is, of course, beyond our power to rewrite the State's requirement by providing exemptions for those who do not wish to participate in the flag salute or by making some other accommodations to meet their scruples. That wisdom might suggest the making of such accommodations, and that school administration would not find it too difficult to make them, and yet maintain the ceremony for those not refusing to conform, is outside our province to suggest. Tact, respect, and generosity toward variant views will always commend themselves to those charged with the duties of legislation so as to achieve a maximum of good will and to require a minimum of unwilling submission to a general law. But the real question is, who is to make such accommodations, the courts or the legislature?

This is no dry, technical matter. It cuts deep into one's conception of the democratic process -- it concerns no less the practical differences between the means for making these accommodations that are open to courts and to legislatures. A court can only strike down. It can only say "This or that law is void." It cannot modify or qualify, it cannot make exceptions to a general requirement. [p*652] And it strikes down not merely for a day. At least the finding of unconstitutionality ought not to have ephemeral significance unless the Constitution is to be reduced to the fugitive importance of mere legislation. When we are dealing with the Constitution of the United States, and, more particularly, with the great safeguards of the Bill of Rights, we are dealing with principles of liberty and justice "so rooted in the traditions and conscience of our people as to be ranked as fundamental" -- something without which "a fair and enlightened system of justice would be impossible." Palko v. Connecticut, 302 U.S. 319 , 325 ; Hurtado v. California, 110 U.S. 516 , 530 , 531 . If the function of this Court is to be essentially no different from that of a legislature, if the considerations governing constitutional construction are to be substantially those that underlie legislation, then indeed judges should not have life tenure, and they should be made directly responsible to the electorate. There have been many, but unsuccessful, proposals in the last sixty years to amend the Constitution to that end. See Sen.Doc. No. 91, 75th Cong., 1st Sess., pp. 248-251.

Conscientious scruples, all would admit, cannot stand against every legislative compulsion to do positive acts in conflict with such scruples. We have been told that such compulsions override religious scruples only as to major concerns of the state. But the determination of what is major and what is minor itself raises questions of policy. For the way in which men equally guided by reason appraise importance goes to the very heart of policy. Judges should be very diffident in setting their judgment against that of a state in determining what is, and what is not, a major concern, what means are appropriate to proper ends, and what is the total social cost in striking the balance of imponderables.

What one can say with assurance is that the history out of which grew constitutional provisions for religious equality [p*653] and the writings of the great exponents of religious freedom -- Jefferson, Madison, John Adams, Benjamin Franklin -- are totally wanting in justification for a claim by dissidents of exceptional immunity from civic measures of general applicability, measures not, in fact, disguised assaults upon such dissident views. The great leaders of the American Revolution were determined to remove political support from every religious establishment. They put on an equality the different religious sects -- Episcopalians, Presbyterians, Catholics, Baptists, Methodists, Quakers, Huguenots -- which, as dissenters, had been under the heel of the various orthodoxies that prevailed in different colonies. So far as the state was concerned, there was to be neither orthodoxy nor heterodoxy. And so Jefferson and those who followed him wrote guaranties of religious freedom into our constitutions. Religious minorities, as well as religious majorities, were to be equal in the eyes of the political state. But Jefferson and the others also knew that minorities may disrupt society. It never would have occurred to them to write into the Constitution the subordination of the general civil authority of the state to sectarian scruples.

The constitutional protection of religious freedom terminated disabilities, it did not create new privileges. It gave religious equality, not civil immunity. Its essence is freedom from conformity to religious dogma, not freedom from conformity to law because of religious dogma. Religious loyalties may be exercised without hindrance from the state, not the state may not exercise that which, except by leave of religious loyalties, is within the domain of temporal power. Otherwise, each individual could set up his own censor against obedience to laws conscientiously deemed for the public good by those whose business it is to make laws.

The prohibition against any religious establishment by the government placed denominations on an equal footing [p*654] -- it assured freedom from support by the government to any mode of worship and the freedom of individuals to support any mode of worship. Any person may therefore believe or disbelieve what he pleases. He may practice what he will in his own house of worship or publicly within the limits of public order. But the lawmaking authority is not circumscribed by the variety of religious beliefs -- otherwise, the constitutional guaranty would be not a protection of the free exercise of religion, but a denial of the exercise of legislation.


Monday, December 16, 2002

More Cross Burning. I work with an attorney who, while a young girl in the 1970s, had a cross burned on her front lawn. She said she didn't understand what was happening at the time, but as you can imagine, her parents were pretty frightened.

As a side note to the story -- her father later ended up representing the man who burned the cross. The man begged forgiveness which was granted. Since this is not my story, I'm being somewhat vague, so as to not violate someone's privacy.
Sister Kathy. The other day we celebrated my number one sister's birthday and it got me thinking about the day we lost her with the garbage. That was back when I was about 5 and she must have been 3. We lived in Tsoying, on the outskirst of Kaohsiung, China. We were actually pretty fortunate in that we had indoor plumbing and our sewage did not flow into the binjo ditch. Moreover, we had trash pick up -- a man came by with his water buffalo and picked up the trash. Well, one day he took my little sister -- at that time, my only sister -- for a ride. Panic ensued, but in the end, she was fine.

I'm not sure why I write about this -- maybe it's just the juxtaposition between lives -- my childhood with these things (we boiled all our drinking water, for example) and my kids.

Sheesh, I am getting old.

Tomorrow, I'll tell you about the adventure on the roof of the Ambassador Hotel or describe the wonderful aroma of the Love River (where do you think all those binjo ditches flowed to?).
Hotchpot. Congratulations to Mark Byron and his Florida Blogistas for their overwhelming victory over my Idiots in the first round of yesterday's Blogger Bowl 2K3 playoffs. My team, the aptly named Idiots, was representing the small township of Asylum, Pennsylvania, we are sorry to have let the town down but we appreciated all the fans who met us at the airstrip last night. We appreciated those who left their pitchforks at home.

To those Republicans down about things after the Louisiana race and Trent Lott -- things look brighter in Hawai'i: Linda Lingle may restore a second party in that state (plus actually doing good things for the state). Here's local columnist David Shapiro on how.

A good note about how the Clintonistas still running federal agencies (they are in total control of mine, for example -- no nominations over 2 years after the election) are blocking freedom and progress.

Here's an interesting note about a suppressed Disney flick -- the Small One -- a story about the donkey that brought the Holy Family to Bethlehem.

And I'll end with football -- the Redskins looked great for the first play and a half... and what was the deal with that punt block -- that guy was in there fast enough to pick the ball out of mid-air -- how in the world did he miss getting any part of the ball and still manage to rough the kicker?
Covers. It appears that blogger ate my note on the Time and Newsweek covers last night. Basically, I like the Newsweek cover with it's old picture of Trent as opposed to the Time cover of modern Trent set against the old Dixiecrat backdrop. The scarry thing about the old Trent picture is that he looks like a cross between Lee Harvey Oswald and Kevin Costner as Kenny O'Donnell in 13 Days.

Sunday, December 15, 2002

Pink Candle. So why is there a pink candle in the Advent wreath -- did they run out of dye? Advent is a time of penitence and fasting -- like Lent. Christmas, like Easter, is the payoff from this time of fasting -- a time of feasting and celebration. The color the Church uses to denote a season of penance or repentance is purple.

So why the pink candle? Actually, not only should the candle be pink this Sunday, but all the vestments that are normally a color (purple, green, red) should be pink or rose colored. This is because even during -- or perhaps especially during -- a time of penance and fasting, we needed to be reminded it is God's grace that delivers us. This Sunday (and there is a counterpart in Lent that escapes me for the moment) is that Sunday of grace -- symbolized by the pink or rose vestments and candle. This is Gaudete Sunday -- gaudete being Latin for "rejoice" (I believe).

If you light candles on a Advent wreath -- and I do hope you do -- remember that is by Grace we are Saved and rejoice!

Saturday, December 14, 2002

Lott's Dreaming of a White Christmas. Just like the one he used to know. *sigh* I predict this alone will cost the GOP at least one percentage point in the presidential election in 2004, and it will continue to have a ripple effect for years to come.

"Strange, isn't it? Each man's life touches so many other lives. . ." - Clarence, It's a Wonderful Life.

Friday, December 13, 2002

(We don't need no) Colour Code. Today, at the end of 2003, I wonder as I wander why we are dwelling on the 1948 Democratic Party Platform and a 50-year old statute that has successfully prevented cross-burning. Yes, I wander -- I meander. For that, I hope you forgive me, but allow me to wander...
Not Here



First, Trent Lott should show that he has some honor and step down as the leader of the Senate. What he did was not to endorse a person but to endorse a way of life that some, including that person, were seeking to hold on to. Moreover it was a vile, evil system.

Just last month I was in a building that was the main train depot for Raleigh, NC -- as many renovated buildings do, it had the blueprints for the building on the wall as kind of a nostalgic decoration. But if you looked at it closely, you saw a white waiting room and a colored waiting room, half it's size. Moreover when you looked at those rooms -- when you stood in them and felt the environment and looked at the original walls and ceilings, it was evident that the colored room was designed to be minimally functional -- worse than a jail. There is a BBQ in Alexandria, VA I took my daughter too. It has a sit-down restaurant and, behind the kitchen, there is a take out window. It's an old place -- this was originally designed as a whites restaurant and a blacks take-out. My father tells me when he played football in college, his nationally ranked team had to forfeit a game because they had a black player on the team and the Texas school wouldn't let them in the town if they brought that player. (This was four years after that 1948 election.) I could go on an on with innumerable examples -- these are three simple ones that come to mind.

To borrow from Abraham Lincoln, who said in his second inaugural address:
Fondly do we hope, fervently do we pray, that this mighty scourge of war may speedily pass away. Yet, if God wills that it continue until all the wealth piled by the bondsman's two hundred and fifty years of unrequited toil shall be sunk, and until every drop of blood drawn with the lash shall be paid by another drawn with the sword, as was said three thousand years ago, so still it must be said "the judgments of the Lord are true and righteous altogether."
I want nothing more for this affliction visited on our country by our pragmatic forefathers to end. But it can not end until we get beyond foolish statements (and wishes) like that by Trent Lott.

A subpoint on this subject -- yesterday afternoon, I'd finished my audiobook -- stuck in traffic, I turned on Sean Hannity, in part because of what Mark Byron wrote yesterday. I found the show nauseating and quickly switched. Basically, the thrust I was hearing was a whiny "it's time to move on." And this was no self-parody, nor was it done with any irony. It sounded just like I was back in the late 90's listening to the Clinton defenders. Those folks were sick then and they're sick now in their current incarnation as Lott defenders. (BTW, I don't mean to lump Dr. Byron in the latter. And Mark, with all due respect, I think the people of America can distinguish between a gaffe and a statement of support for intollerant way of life.)

Sorry, I really didn't intend to do anything on Lott -- it's actually the second subject of this meander that I'm more interested in.

Second, this week the Supremes heard oral arguments in Virginia v. Black, Docket No. 01-1107, the attack on the Virginia cross-burning statute. MoDowd wannabe, Dahlia Lithwick, came in first with a summary of the orals (although she flubbed the number of justices on the Virginia Supreme Court, a mistake since corrected), noting that the contemplative Justice Clarence Thomas focused the issue:
Out of nowhere booms the great, surprising "Luke-I-am-your-father" voice of He Who Never Speaks. Justice Clarence Thomas suddenly asks a question and everyone's head pops up and starts looking madly around, like the Muppets on Veterinarian Hospital. "Aren't you understating the effects ... of 100 years of lynching?" he booms. "This was a reign of terror, and the cross was a sign of that. ... It is unlike any symbol in our society. It was intended to cause fear, terrorize."
And this is precisely why the statute should stand, as well as the convictions. Or, as Justice Antonin Scalia observed (via Lithwick): "Scalia demands to know why brandishing a burning cross is protected speech while "brandishing a weapon and saying 'you're next,' " isn't.

I confess, I'm not fond of hate speech laws and speech codes and so on (in fact, I loathe them), but there is a distinction between protected speech and a threat, and I believe the Virginia statute correctly draws the line. For a more complete defense of the statute, I would recommend Virginia Justice Leroy Roundtree Hassell, Sr. dissent, which may be found here. Justice Hassell wrote, in part,
Initially, I observe that Code § 18.2-423, by its express terms, does not proscribe every act of burning a cross. Rather, Code § 18.2-423 only proscribes the act of burning a cross when such act is performed "with the intent of intimidating any person or group of persons" and the act is
committed "on the property of another, a highway or other public place." In the context of our criminal statutes, specifically Code § 18.2-61, we have defined intimidation as acts which put the victim "in fear of bodily harm. Such fear must arise from the willful conduct of the accused, rather than from some mere temperamental timidity of the victim; however, the fear of the victim need not be so great as to result in terror, panic, or hysteria." [cite omitted]
In brief, like Scalia noted, it's like brandishing a pistol and saying you're next. [See also, the opinion of the Virginia Court of Appeals affirming the sentence.]

[On a side note, Justice Hassel, who is black, has been elected to serve as the next Chief Justice of the Supreme Court by his peers on the Court, his term starting in February 2003. Those of you familiar with Regent University might be interested in this press release. This is one of those ways that the South is changing that I am so proud of -- to hell with the idea that the Dixiecrat platform was the right way to go.]

BTW, in a brief in support of the defendants in this case, brought by the Council of Conservative Citizens, to whom Trent Lott gave a keynote address in 1992, we learn that
"the burning cross, the traditional symbol of the Ku Klux Klan, [i]s an expression of unyielding opposition" by "Euro-American militants" "to what they plausibly believe to be a minority-liberal agenda that threatens to diminish and to eventually eliminate traditional Euro-American influence in this country."

Last, credit for the title on this post goes to Steve Taylor and his song about BJU.

Update. See this note for a good explanation as to why the Sup.Ct. will uphold the Virginia statute -- I hope Kyle is right.

Thursday, December 12, 2002

Football III The Cumulative Average NFL Power Rankings. But first, we have a consensus -- the Bengals are the unanimous number 32 ranked team. Congratulations.
No. Team Avg. Hi Lo
1 Raiders 1.88 1 3
2 Eagles 2.13 1 4
3 Bucs 2.13 1 4
4 Packers 5.38 4 8
5 Falcons 6.25 3 9
6 Saints 6.5 3 11
7 Dolphins 7.25 4 13
8 49ers 7.38 4 14
9 Patriots 9.63 6 15
10 Chargers 11.5 7 18
11 Jets 11.75 5 15
12 Titans 12 10 17
13 Colts 12.13 10 15
14 Chiefs 13.38 9 17
15 Broncos 13.63 8 18
16 Steelers 14 10 17
17 Giants 17.5 15 20
18 Browns 17.88 15 21
19 Bills 18 16 19
20 Ravens 20.25 19 23
21 Rams 22.5 19 27
22 Cowboys 22.75 21 26
23 Jaguars 23.13 21 25
24 Redskins 23.5 22 26
25 Seahawks___ 25.63____ 24__ 26__
26 Vikings 26 19 30
27 Panthers 26.25 23 27
28 Texans 27.63 25 31
29 Cardinals 28.13 26 31
30 Bears 29 28 30
31 Lions 30.63 29 31
32 Bengals 32 32 32




Sources: ESPN, Sports Illustrated, Sporting News, War Room, CBS, Sagarin (USA Today), Sports Central,
and the AP.
Football II -- Yay! I'm the Blogger Bowl 2K3 regular season champion -- but as countless teams of yore are well aware, regular season doesn't mean anything once the playoffs start. My team's first game is against Mark Byron's Florida Blogistas. Mark and I have had a couple of close games this year and I figure this one will be equally close. The Blogistas lost probably the most key player of the year, Donovan McNabb, earlier and Randy Moss hasn't performed up to expectations (but he's still ahead of most). On my roster I've been carrying Shaun Alexander who has been similarly disappointing. I'm most pleased with my waiver pick-up of Chad Johnson (Cin.) a few weeks ago. My workhorse, of course, has been LaDainian Tomlinson.

In setting the roster this week, I've had to decide between Jerry Porter, who's been somewhat off the past couple of weeks, and Rod Smith, who seems to have become the number two receiver for the Broncos. Similarly, I don't expect Charlie Garner to have a big day against Miami, but can't see James Stewart having one against TB. I agree with Mark's starting picks except, perhaps kicker Steve Christie going against Buffalo -- I figure he should have at least 4 PAs and maybe one FG. I think Morton Anderson (against Denver) should have 2-4 FGs and 2-4 PAs. But these things are always so iffy -- both Mark and I left big points on the bench last week (QBs Brad Johnson and Jeff Garcia). It's for fun.

Update. Another reason why it's wise for Mark to start Brad Johnson -- something I didn't know: "15: Touchdowns thrown in the last six weeks by Brad Johnson, three more than any other quarterback." Kind of surprising, eh?
Football I. Like Earl Warren, I'll ease back into things by starting with the Sports page and save the front page. First up, I see the NFL has given the Vikings a big "Tuck You" (sorry, couldn't resist) regarding the officiating by Walt "Snow Job" Coleman: nine mistakes, eight being in the fourth quarter. Still a loss for the Vikes.

Wednesday, December 11, 2002

Excuse the Interruption. All of us -- the entire family of six -- was hit by an especially bad bug starting late Friday night. My wife and I were scrubbing carpets, floors, walls and doing boatloads of laundry, that is until Mrs. Idiot got it on Monday. (I kept up laundry duty -- by Monday we'd pretty much trained the kids to use a bucket -- sorry for the gross details). I was the last to get it -- and seem to be getting over it. I'm on-line so I can check my work e-mail and let you know I'll be back soon.

I'll try to post the football rankings tonight.

Friday, December 06, 2002

Prey Okay, for what it's worth, here is the readers digest version of Michael Crichton's Prey. First of all, while I had some fun with this, it does contain all kind of spoilers, so you really shouldn't read this unless you read the book. Second, this is in fun -- because I did like the book -- it was something that held my attention. Go out and buy the book and have fun with it -- let it engross you and entertain you. Then come back here and read this gentle parody.


It's midnight now. The house is dark. I am not sure how this will turn. The kids are all desperately sick, throwing up. I should be attending to them, but I’m too engrossed in Michael Crichton’s new novel, Prey, to attend to them. Let me tell you the story so you don’t wind up in a similar situation…

Day One 11:17 a.m.

I’m Jack Forman, I used to make distributed parallel processing or agent-based programs, but that got too confusing to my VC (Venture Capitalists, to those of you not familiar with the lingo), so my boss called it the Forman Grill to capitalize on my name and the success of another product. I was honest, too honest perhaps, and when I discovered my boss had off-shore accounts to skim off the fat from the Grill, I signed a NDA (look, I can’t keep stopping the story to explain these things to you - look it up) and took a big lump sum to leave the company. No, I wasn’t fired. No, no, no, no. Ask my head-hunter who keeps talking about shelf life. I wanted to leave so I could go shopping for diapers and table settings.

Shopping - now, I could tell you a thing or two about shelf life. Did you know that nanoparticles of garlic salt has a shelf-life of 50 years? Strawberry jam, however, only has a shelf-life of 6 to 9 months. Worst of all are linen table mats if you use strawberry jam - they get so stained that even boiling water can’t take it out. And I’m sure that bacteria grow on those stains . . .

This is why I’m out shopping at Crate and Barrel for new placemats. Don’t these yellow ones look pretty?

Oops, that’s my cell phone. Oh, it’s my strikingly pretty wife, Julia, who at 36 is the mother of my three off-spring and is the Vice President of Xymos, a world leader in molecular manufacturing. I think I’ll keep her.

“Hi Jack, look I can’t come to Eric’s soccer game today, I’m too busy administering the kiss of life to all my co-workers. Oh, and don’t buy the yellow placemats.”

Hmmm, I wonder if she’s having an affair. And how did she know about the placemats??!!!?

Well, I’ll go get diapers for the baby.

Day One 11:49 a.m.

Oh, look, it’s Ricky Morse, a handsome surfer guy who used to work for me and now works for Julia. He’s looking pretty buff for a guy who’s just given birth to a whole swarm of children - I can’t remember if he had twins, triplets or what.

“Hi Jack, what kind of diapers do you use?”

“Hi Ricky, I like Pampers because of their anti-static properties.”

“Not me Jack, I prefer Huggies because they contain the nanopoops.”

“Nice lipstick, Ricky.”

“Thanks, Julia gave it to me.”

“See you in Nevada.”

“Not if I see you first.”

I don’t trust Ricky.

Day One 1:14 p.m.

“Hi Dad, you just missed mom and this creepy faceless guy who looked like a surfer.” It was Nicole, my oldest kid. “She said she had to go to work all night in the middle of the desert in Nevada. Oh, and she looked really buff.”

“That’s nice, dear, where’s your brother and sister.”

“Eric’s playing with Amanda---”

“Hmm”

“-Mom did something to her and now she’s all black; but if you twist her arms just right, she’s like an etch-a-sketch. Dad, what does Mom do in the desert all night in Nevada?”

“Now dear, you know your mom had a degree in child psychology.”

“Yeah.”

“So she does some sort of work that is only legal in Nevada and involves a lot of kissing.”

“Umm.”

“She’s a molecular manufacturer.”

“Right, Dad. Are you in denial?”

“That’s my sister’s line Nicole. Oh, hey, look at the time, I need to meet my headhunter or take Amanda in for an MRI or something.”

Day One 3:04 p.m.

“Eric, Mom won’t be able to come to your soccer game today.”

“That’s okay. Do you know why my .mp3 player doesn’t work? It worked fine before Mom kissed it.”

“Here, let me look at it - I used to do this kind of thing at MediaTronics - oh, look something’s been gnawing on the microprocessor.”

“Okay - I’ll talk to Mom about doing some vacuuming.”

Day One 5:47 p.m.

“Hey Dad, Mom called to say she’ll be coming home for dinner after all. She said she’d bring home Japanese circuits and something fleshy that dissolves quickly.”

“That’s great Nicole, how’s Amanda?”

“She really cries a lot when we shake her up to do a new drawing.”

“Okay, I’m going to take her in for an MRI. Any other calls?”

“You’re sister called to say you’re in denial and is flying up. Also MediaTronics wants you to work as a consultant in Nevada. They said their having problems with algor--”

“Al Gore? The original terminal man? No, no, that was Rising Sun - Crichton relied on him too much in that book on Japanese Industrial Policy. Besides, he’s as irrelevant as a velociraptor.”

“No, they’re having problems with an algorithm you wrote.”

“Well there’s plenty of diapers for the baby - I’ll go to Nevada after your mom drives the car off a cliff.”

Day One 5:48 p.m.

Boom!

Day One 5:49 p.m.

“Okay, now I can go to Nevada.”

“Dad, I didn’t get to tell you about the ghost who vacuumed my room.”
“This is supposed to be a brief parody, Eric, we don’t have time for that.”

“You don’t love me.”

“Do you want me to kiss you?”

“Bye Dad.”

Day Two 5:29 a.m.

“Look at that swarm - I’ve never seen anything like it…”

“Hell, that ain’t nothing, that’s just the PR guys. Wait until you see the lawyers show up in the next iteration. Get your stuff in here, it’s time to meet the expendable personnel.”

“I’m David Brooks - I’m even more scared than the rabbit that gets eaten.”

“And I’m Rosie Castro - see my big breasts.”

“Umm, it was nice knowing the both of you.”

“I’m Charley Davenport I burp, fart, and hum a lot. I’m pretty annoying.”

“You’re fat and sloppy. I thought you were Dennis Nedry?”

“That was another book - here I’m a good guy, but I still get eaten.”

“Where’s the field biologist who’s quiet and underappreciated? The one who can build bombs?

“I’m Mae Chang - we worked together before - I’ve been Theresa Asakuma, Dr. Karen Ross --”

“Let’s get a move on people, we’ve got a lot to do before this day’s up…”

“Hi Ricky, you’re looking buff.”

“Let’s go on a tour Jack, we don’t have much time before the rabbit gets eaten.”

Day Two 7:02 a.m.

“Okay Jack, here’s where I disclose the vehicle for getting us all in the desert with them, so pay attention. We have a contract from the Pentagon, which is the worst form of evil on the face of the earth--”

“I thought corporations were. Like the one that funded Dr. Jonas Miller in Twister. I thought we like government funding”

“Yeah, corporations and venture capitalists are evil. Government funding is usually okay, but the Pentagon is always the worst - it trumps everything. That’s why we had Jonas Miller driving his weather trucks painted in Army green, so you’d know they were bad. Really bad. Army Bad. Non-defense research is always good, unless funded by venture capitalists, they expect results-”

“Dr. Venkman--”

“I’m Ricky and quit interrupting me - this is going on too long already. Look, the Pentagon wanted us to develop a bunch of little camera-like receptors - sort of like the rods and cones in the back of your eye -- to go spy on enemy forces and send back pictures. We developed these molecule-sized particles -nanoparticles - that do just that, only they were too light and tended to blow away. So we had to figure out a way to make them more stable. We loaded them up with jet engines, radio, memory, sound machines, and color changing ability. They were still as wobbly as the first George Bush so the Pentagon decided to cancel the contract. The company was going to go under and we just couldn’t get decent help. Then Charley left the back window open and they all got away.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Let’s go up here - I have to show you where they got out, so you’ll know about the sprinkler system.”

“Is it red? Red triggers my epilepsy, you know?”

“No, that was the Andromeda Strain - here you have to go up this ladder--”

“I’m afraid of heights”

“Of course. You can take the elevator this time.” We got on the lift and he continued. “The other problem with these things is that they reproduce like Starbucks outlets. They’re solar powered, so they thrive in the desert.”

“Well, why don’t you just go out at night and round them up with a bunch of blow-dryers?”

“We thought of that, but there are two problems. First, we don’t have enough extension cords. Second, they’re so small we can’t ever find them.”

“Why don’t you paint them with glow-in-the-dark-stuff?”

“We don’t have any - but we do have a lot of radioactive stuff we could use.”

Day Two 10:21 a.m.

“Hey, how did that time marker get there - I was still talking?”

Just then, Charley belched heavily behind us. “Oh, geez, here you are. The rabbit’s died--”

“Is someone pregnant?”

“No, it was the nanoparticles – they killed the rabbit. Mae went out without you and dissected it. Now it’s time for you to go to the shed with Charley, Rosie, Mae and David.”

Day Two 10:41 a.m.

Boy, it was hot out – I’d hate to end up stuck in a car with vinyl seats and the windows rolled up on a day like this. At least the wind was blowing – no swarms of nanoparticles to chase us around. “Okay, let’s go find that radioactive stuff.”

“Jack, you’re supposed to use a scientific name – not stuff – otherwise people start thinking about plot and dialogue and forget about the gadgets.”

“I found the stuff” belched Charley, “let me put it in these Windex bottles.”

“Jack I’m really scared” stammered David Brooks “can we go back inside the complex?”

“Yeah Jack, hasn’t the wind died down enough for us to be threatened yet?”

“Not yet – besides Mae hasn’t found the explosives we’ll need later.”

Day Two 3:10: p.m.

It took awhile – several hours in fact, for the wind to die down so we could be threatened by the swarm of nanoparticles. The whole time I had to put up with David’s whining, Rosie’s Shakespeare and Charley’s bodily noises. Finally, we got the word from the complex that the wind had died down and the flock of raptors had returned. I mean particles, yeah, particles – big clouds of particles.

“Okay, here’s my plan” I explained. “We’ll have Charley take the lead and we’ll all move in formation – head straight for the swarm and then burp and blow them out of the way.”

“I can’t do it Jack, I used up all my gas in the past few hours – I can’t – ” but before he could finish David Brooks broke and ran. He looked just like that rabbit. Just as we thought he was going to make it, the particles all lay down on the ground and made a line 1/10,000 of an inch thick. David tripped and fell – he was snatched up and was carried him off to the Wicked Witch by the flying monkeys.

Next was Rosie – they didn’t like her Shakespeare. Charley, Mae and I all ran for the cars. We baked, Charley was in a different car from Mae and I and the critters found their way in – he sprayed ‘em with Windex. The wind came back; we went inside; Julia came back; Mae discovered a phage ate the bacteria that powered the particles. It smelled like poopy diapers. Mae and I drank some – Charley discovered that Julia, Ricky and some of the others were hosts for the pod people. Julia kissed Charley and he died. Mae and I blew up the nest of the particles but the more civilized particles inside had taken over Ricky and Julia and were eating them alive. So much for looking buff.

I climbed the tower and we sprayed poopy water all over everyone and they all screamed: “I’m melting, melting” and dissolved into brown sugar.

Day Seven 11:57 p.m.

Yeah, all that happened in the last seven days. Mae and I were the only survivors. I came home and made the kids drink the poopy water and everyone threw up, except the baby, but she didn’t work as an etch-a-sketch anymore. I lost all my stock options not to mention Julia’s. Oh, I guess I lost Julia as well. But I got these really cool yellow placemats and, thanks to Nanotechnology, they’re stain-resistant.

But next time, we might not be so lucky.


Thursday, December 05, 2002

Quickies. I just finished reading Prey -- I loved it -- couldn't put it down -- will make a great movie -- just don't think about the holes and fluff.

I'm officially a geezer now. My turn signal is broken and stuck on.

I took the day off and enjoyed the snow -- I'd guess we got about 6 inches.

Great column about how the old guys used to take care of a Warren Sapp.

Wednesday, December 04, 2002

Power Rankings. My Raiders lead the pack at number 3. Well, that's the way I read this chart -- and I think it's somewhat more accurate. Basically, the ordinal numbers on the left reflect the position of each team, but the "Cu" (or cumulative average) reflects a team's true standing. If you look at the first four teams here, they range from 2.75 to 3.5 -- or rounding, there is a four-way tie for number three. This is appropriate for this year, I think.
No. Team Cu. Hi Lo
1 Raiders 2.75 1 6
2 Eagles 2.88 1 9
3 Bucs 3.13 1 5
4 Falcons 3.5 1 6
5 Packers 4.75 3 8
6 49ers 7.88 3 11
7 Saints 8 4 10
8 Chargers 8.75 3 17
9 Colts 8.88 6 12
10 Broncos 9.63 4 13
11 Dolphins 10.38 7 16
12 Steelers 10.88 7 13
13 Patriots 12.13 9 15
14 Jets 14 6 17
15 Titans 14.13 11 16
16 Chiefs 15.38 13 17
17 Bills 16.75 14 20
18 Ravens 18.25 17 19
19 Giants 19.5 17 21
20 Browns 19.63 18 21
21 Rams 20.5 18 23
22 Redskins 23.13 20 26
23 Jaguars 23.38 21 27
24 Cowboys 23.5 20 26
25__ Seahawks___ 24.63___ 23___ 25___
26 Vikings 26 20 30
27 Bears 26.75 25 28
28 Panthers 27 24 30
29 Cardinals 29.75 27 32
30 Lions 29.88 28 31
31 Texans 30.25 29 32
32 Bengals 31.5 29 32



Sources: ESPN, Sports Illustrated, Sporting News, War Room, CBS, Sagarin (USA Today),
and the AP.
I'm still here -- I've just been quiet lately. Yesterday, my wife and I had another funeral. I guess this is the hardest part of turning 40, having the parents of our peers passing away. That sounds self-centered -- I don't mean it to be. I ache for those friends and their families and try to help out.

Yesterday was the mother of a good friend of ours. I was very honored to be asked to be a pall bearer. It's very hard to lose your mother... This is the third mother of three very close ladies of a small group we've participated in to have passed away in the past three years. All by cancer. A co-worker of mine told me his mother died 12 years ago and there's not a day that goes by that he doesn't think of her.

Anyway, I'll put up the NFL power rankings in a little bit and be back in a day or two. It's time for me to take a break from blithering and be still.

Monday, December 02, 2002

Shades. The WaPo writes of the emerging anti-war effort which runs the spectrum from crimson to tomato: "It's a campaign of all different kinds of groups, from the National Council of Churches to the International Socialists organization"

Sunday, December 01, 2002

Happy New Year! Advent begins today -- and a new liturgical year.

Saturday, November 30, 2002

Judge Keith. Here is a link to the obituary for Judge James Keith, whom I mentioned below.

Friday, November 29, 2002

The Puritan Myth. A good article that ran in several newspapers across the country the past few days points out the myth popularized by Mencken that the Puritans lived with "the haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy" is a flat-out lie. Sample quote:
Despite academics' efforts to set the record straight, Puritans continue to be cast wearing drab clothing, when in fact they often wore colorful outfits for their era. They're portrayed as teetotalers, when records show they consumed large quantities of beer, rum, ale and alcoholic cider. They're blamed for burning witches in Salem, even though convicted witches were usually hanged, not burned, and with less frequency and more due process of law than in Europe.
I recommend reading the whole article.

Wednesday, November 27, 2002

Song. About a month ago, I mentioned a song by Steve Taylor, Over My Dead Body, written in Warsaw in 1984, written about Grzegorz Przemyk a Polish Youth Worker slain by the Communist government. A friend of mine has posted it on-line in .mp3 format. You can download it here (scroll down).

Tuesday, November 26, 2002

What were they thinking? Volokh co-conspirator Stuart Banner, in a brief post that could easily be overlooked, asks:
It wasn't so long ago that people owned other people as slaves, women couldn't vote, and so on. We all have a list of past practices that seem appalling today. A century or two from now, our descendants will likely think the same about us. Some of the things we do will seem shockingly inhmane. Our great-great-grandchildren will scratch their heads and wonder "What were those people thinking?" But which of our practices are the ones they'll criticize?
My guess would be our treatment of children. From the societal support of abortion on demand, which the generations will rightly condemn as "how could they just kill developing humans?" to the sexualization of children (see the Tom Petty quote below), I think in many respects we've failed our children.
Life and death... My wife called and let me know the mother of a close friend of ours passed away last night. This was not unexpected -- in fact, my wife took care of their daughter yesterday so that the couple could be with her at the hospital. Since the daughter was sick, my oldest watched our kids while I was at work (since she's on Thanksgiving break, this was do-able). My wife said that when she called the church to update them, she found out two other members of the congregation had also passed away last night. One of those was a true Virginia gentleman, James Keith, who I first met when I interned at Fairfax Legal Aid in 1980. Judge Keith had just retired from the court and was working part-time as a volunteer for Legal Aid -- he was very respected and he imprinted himself in my mind's eye as the proto-type gentleman jurist. The following is a brief description of his life, from the Virginia State Bar:
James Keith was born and raised in Warrenton. Because of his own father's untimely death in early middle age, the senior Keith attended VMI on scholarship and then went on to Harvard Law School, graduating in 1935 and moving to Fairfax to join his uncle's law firm. Like many Harvard graduates during World War II, the senior Keith was assigned to the U.S. Intelligence Service and then returned to his legal practice after the war. In the 1960s, Mr. Keith became a judge of the Fairfax Circuit Court, where he presided until his retirement in 1979.
Years later, after law school and several moves, my wife and I joined as members of Truro Church in Fairfax and I was delighted to see the Judge there with his bride -- what a charming couple they were. She passed away after a long bout with cancer -- talking with the Judge's son at church a few weeks ago, I knew it wouldn't be long. He said that the dementia was pretty bad, but he was thankful for the lucid moments.

As I said, this man was a gentle man and I was honored by my fleeting time with him.

Life, life.

Another friend of ours is putting out calls for platelets and plasma for a young girl -- I'll be spending some time doing that in the next few week. Platelets can be given every five days, it just takes about three hours at a time to do so.

Thank you all for understanding my continued absences from here.

Sunday, November 24, 2002

Magazines and Masons. I'm not excited about either the Newsweek or the Time magazine cover for this week. I'd give the nod to Time for its LOTR theme, but I just don't like the busy picture. I saw the LOTR2 preview before Harry Potter and the Chamberpot of Secrets (opps, hope that's not a spoiler) and am looking forward to this one. I really liked Chamber and will have to write more about this sometime.

In the meantime, I'll give you a link to an article noting that the Archbishop of Canterbury-designate has questioned the “compatibility” of freemasonry with Christian teaching. I've expressed my opinion elsewhere -- I think it was in comments to Dr. Byron's blog -- that the freemasonry issue doesn't bother me -- I'd put it on a par with gambling. I'm actually more troubled about (+)AofC's involvement with the druid ceremonies.

Last -- our sermon today was based on, you guessed it, What Would Jesus Drive?

Thursday, November 21, 2002

Back. Hi -- I've been out for a little while -- in Hyannis and then Plymouth, Massachusetts. I didn't see any Kennedys while in Hyannis, but I guess it's Palm Beach season now. I drove by Plymouth Rock and was interested to note it's right by the road.

Speaking of Plymouth Rock, I should note that I'll probably be pretty busy through Thanksgiving, but don't forget about me.

Of course as a Virginian, I must point out that the first Thanksgiving in the New World was in Virginia. (Or was it in North Carolina? or Florida? or Texas?-- in any event, if Pat Buchanan had been around back then, we wouldn't be celebrating those Puritan Wetbacks today)

Friday, November 15, 2002

More on Just War and Iraq. The Church of England endorsed a unilateral attack on Iraq, yet the Church of Rome (U.S.) disagrees. I wonder about the wisdom of having "Cardinal Bernard F. Law of Boston, chairman of the bishops' international affairs committee" coming out and saying the statement by the Bishops "does not ignore Iraq's dangerous behavior, intentions and threats." Sort of like he and his fellow Bishops didn't ignore the pedastry in the ministry?
She was an American girl.
Only a sick culture would sexualize young girls. It's disgusting. It's not just pop music, it's fashion, it's TV, it's advertising, it's every element of our culture. Young women are not being respected, children aren't being respected.

Why are we creating a nation of child molesters? Could it be that we're dressing up 9-year-old women to look sexy? I really don't put it past these advertising people to say, 'Well, look, we made a lot of money when we brought the 9-year-old out and made her look like a hooker. Let's do it again.'

I think television's become a downright dangerous thing. It has no moral barometer whatsoever. If you want to talk about something that is all about money, just watch the television. TV does not care about you or what happens to you. It's downright bad for your health now, and that's not a far-out concept.

I think watching the TV news is bad for you. It is bad for your physical health and your mental health. The music business looks like, you know, innocent schoolboys compared to the TV business. They care about nothing but profit. They will make a movie about murdering their kids, you know? And they'll put the guy who killed them on TV. And before long, he might even have his own show."

—Rock singer Tom Petty, interviewed in the Nov. 14 issue of Rolling Stone
Zero Stars. Steven Segal movies generally suck and it appears that this one is no different. There is a wonderful website, Rotten Tomatoes, that surveys all the reviews of a movie and classifies each as being "fresh" (thumbs up) or "rotten" (thumbs down) -- usually even abysmal movies (jack***) get one or two fresh ratings. Not this one -- it scores a big fat Zero on the old tomatometer
"Fed Sock". That's how those who work for the nefarious Federalist Society refer to their organizations. I'd hoped to go to the convention in town this week -- but work calls.

Of course, this is an extremist group of right-wing attorneys who routinely get together and sing of the glories of the Fatherland and plot how to bring down the government of the people. We won't be satisfied until every male is armed, every female is pregnant, and Corporations can operate with child labor to dump toxic chemicals in the streams and lakes of America.

Actually, no.

I joined nearly two decades ago as a person who favored the repeal of the 2nd Amendment and supported most of the so-called leftist agenda, just because it was a place where one could discuss and debate a wide cross-section of ideas, one of which was Roe v. Wade. If anyone questioned certain orthodoxy in the groups on the left from a perspective that was not on the left, that person was immediately suspect. So I kept quiet about Roe. But I also had concerns about affirmative action and welfare -- and just raising these questions immediately made you out to be anti-poor or racist. Nevermind, for example, that my problem with affirmative action was caused by an African-American client who was seeking access to public housing. Because of his race, he was put on a waiting list and told it would be about 2 years before a space opened up. At that time -- the early 1980's -- a white family would only have to wait at most three months for a space. The reason? The public housing project had to be racially mixed. I had similar doubts about welfare when I began meeting clients who were third (going on fourth --their kids) generation welfare. Ulitmately, I sided with Daniel Patrick Moynihan opposed to welfare reform and am thankful that I was wrong.

My point is that, yes, FedSoc is a conservative legal organization. Yet it is one that allows and nutures the free exchange of ideas and is a lot more welcoming of liberals than liberal organizations are of conservatives. One small example, the faculty advisor of the FedSoc chapter at American U is Jamin Raskin, former counsel to Ralph Nader. Would a chapter of the NLG choose a Lino Graglia to head their organization?

See here for Eugene Volokh's defense of the Fed.Soc.

No secret handshakes -- no payments from Israel or South Africa or the Weathy Industrialists -- no midnight rituals.

Thursday, November 14, 2002

Programming Note. I may be tied up for a week or two -- I'll try to post the Power Rankings next week -- but that might be it for awhile.
The Other Poindexter. John Poindexter has been in the news, again. Yet, I believe if you really want to know about this guy, you have to know about his wife, Linda, a woman who entered the ministry in the Episcopal Church. And then gave it all up to become a Roman Catholic.
Daughter of Blithering Idiot. My daughter, age 13, took this quiz and wants everyone to know she's definitely TJ. Just with better fashion sense:



She's also Washington, D.C. for the quiz below.
Seattle?


Congratulations, you're Seattle, the Emerald City.
What US city are you? Take the quiz by Girlwithagun.
Tucks and other controversial plays.Not a Fumble It's been building up for, oh, I don't know how long...

I saw a replay of the "tuck" fumble during last week's game.

Then another.

And another during MNF.

Of course, ESPN is reliving this and other controversial rulings, in part, because it's their game of the week. The worst ruling, in my mind is still the US-USSR basketball re-re-replay. The one that haunts me, however, is the immaculate deception. Once I got a pristine videotape from NFL films of that play and ran it fram by frame and I swear you could see the ball bounce [as in off the turf] before Franco Harris' hands grasp the ball. Of course, it's out of the frame. I'd love to see the original film of this -- like the Zapruder film, if you look "beneath" the sprocket track, I'm convinced you'll find the missing evidence. The ball bouncing off the grassy knoll.

In the meantime, here's what Eric Allen had to say about the play and here's a column about it's impact on the current Raiders.
More Effective Commentary. According to the National Council of Churches (motto: "...communions of faith joining hands and voices to express the love of Christ and the hate of Republicans") the "hateful and destructive" Jerry Falwell is responsible for the death of Christians in Muslim countries. This, according to "the governing body of the NCC, whose 36 member denominations comprise 50 million adherents."

Jerry Falwell "put[s] at increased risk the lives of thousands of Christian missionaries and humanitarian aid workers, as well as their Christian partners abroad who are engaged in heroic efforts to be peacemakers and bridge-builders in difficult and dangerous circumstances." Moreover, he "create[s] ideal conditions for breeding terrorism among those who may not understand that he does not represent the majority of Christians or Americans."

They sure sound a lot like the Iraqi Foreign Ministry, below, don't they?
Effective Business Correspondence. Ya gotta love a letter that has this as it's opening sentence:
You may recall the huge clamour fabricated by the President of the United States administration, in the biggest and most wicked slander against Iraq, supported in malicious intent, and spearheaded in word and malevolence, by his lackey Tony Blair, when they disseminated the claim that Iraq had perhaps produced, or was on its way to produce, nuclear weapons, during the time when the United Nations inspectors had been absent from Iraq since 1998.
Pithy, Polite, Persuasive.

Wednesday, November 13, 2002

Cumulative Power Ratings. The Pack is back! For the first time, we have a consensus number one pick and it's the Green Bay Packers. Here's the average of the main media power rankings (or indexes) into one cumulative list:
No. Team Cu. Hi Lo
1 Packers 1 1 1
2 49ers 2.75 2 4
3 Saints 3.88 2 11
4 Bucs 5 2 9
5 Broncos 5.38 3 9
6 Eagles 6.38 2 8
7 Steelers 6.5 4 10
8 Falcons 8.25 5 10
9 Patriots 9.38 5 12
10 Chargers 9.88 7 16
11 Raiders 10.5 5 15
12 Rams 12.88 8 17
13 Dolphins 13.88 8 19
14 Bills 14.25 11 21
15 Chiefs 15 10 19
16 Colts 16.38 14 22
17 Titans 16.75 11 23
18 Giants 17.14 15 21
19 Jets 18.38 14 22
20 Ravens 19.88 17 22
21 Jaguars 20.13 14 24
22 Browns 20.63 18 23
23 Redskins 22.25 19 23
24 Cardinals 24.63 20 28
25 Panthers 25.25 24 28
26__ Seahawks____ 25.38__ 24__ 27__
27 Lions 27.38 26 30
28 Cowboys 27.88 26 30
29 Bears 28.25 25 30
30 Vikings 29.38 27 30
31 Bengals 31.25 31 32
32 Texans 31.75 31 32


Sources: ESPN, TSN, War Room, Sagarin (USA Today), CBS, AP, CNNSI, and Sports Central.

Tuesday, November 12, 2002

Randy Barnett. There are a few notes here and there -- the Professor, most noteably -- mentioning Randy Barnett as an ideal candidate for the Supreme Court.

I should write more about this -- these are some preliminary thoughts. Randy Barnett (like Roger Pilon) begin their theory of Constitutional Interpretation based on the limits of enumerated rights. Personally, I find this appealing and persuasive. However, this is not where the Court is now, either on the "right" or the "left." Therefore, to nominate a Barnett or Pilon could burn up a tremendous amount of political capital.

For example, with Barnett he has theory of unenumerated rights is that there is a general presumption of liberty that places the burden on the federal government to show that its regulatory activity is consistent with the the Constitution:
At the national level, the government would bear the burden of showing that its acts were both ‘necessary and proper’ to accomplish an enumerated function, rather than, as now, forcing the citizen to prove why it is he or she should be left alone. At the state level, the burden would fall upon state government to show that legislation infringing the liberty of its citizens was a necessary exercise of its ‘police power’ – that is, the state's power to protect the rights of its citizens.

--Randy E. Barnett, A Ninth Amendment for Today's Constitution, 26 VAL. U. L. REV. 419 at 426. (1991) .
Oh, what the heck, I'll have to come back to this.
He is evil. I used to be a liberal -- I was proud of it. I can not get over, however, how the left deludes itself and twists the language to support its own agenda. Ben Domenech had a brief syllogism that included the phrase "Bill Moyers is evil." Yeah, right, I thought, how is he going to prove this. So I clicked on the link and found Pope Moyers writing
It includes using the taxing power to transfer wealth from working people to the rich.

It includes giving corporations a free hand to eviscerate the environment and control the regulatory agencies meant to hold them accountable.
Wha...?

Transferring wealth? -- umm, Bill look, I'm opposed to regressive taxation and corporate welfare -- those are values that I didn't lose when I left your brand of liberalism, but it's the statists like you that favor giving government control over private wealth and spending decisons. Eviscerating the environment? When did you get a Michael Moore sized lobotomy?

Of course your main concern was the first one on your list:
That mandate includes the power of the state to force pregnant women to give up control over their own lives.
Try this on for size: The power of the state to force business owners to give up control of their businesses to protect a fictious protected animal?

Why, Saint Bill, do you believe the state has the power to seize money and property from private individuals, but is powerless to intervene when a defenseless voiceless person's life is at state?

Ben's right -- Bill Moyers is evil.
Victory. Last night's win by my Raiders was sweet. Jerry Rice is, without a doubt, the greatest wide-out to ever play the game. Rod Woodson keeps surprising me as well -- his interception and return was definately the turning point in the game. And what can you say about Rich Gannon and the O-line? Magnificent.

IMHO, Referee Mike Carey is the best in the business today -- there were only two officiating problems: (1) Shannon Sharpe caught the ball that they ruled was a dropped pass, although this may be one of those instances, like the Tuck rule, where they had to rule the way they did. (2) That whole foul-up with the clock on the Raiders first possession of the second half -- the officials were too slow to spot the ball after a measurement, then they reset the clock for five seconds instead of 25 and neglected to tell Gannon.

Next up, New England (speaking of the tuck rule).

Oh yeah, (update), I forgot about the ruling on the sideline pass that cost Gannon the record of thirty straight completions to open the game. This was a pretty minor play in the context of things, although much later in the game the MNF crew showed that the sideline pass, which had been caught and ruled out-of-bounds, was a good, i.e., valid, catch -- it was in bounds. You know when they go back during the week and review film, the NFL will make corrections to statistics related to yards rushing and so on. I wonder if they would make a change on this -- it doesn't affect the outcome of the game, but it does alter the record book. I think that, after further review, they determine this was a valid catch, they should put it in the books as 30 straight completions. Either that, or they should stop using the film to alter game statistics. (Although, I acknowledge there is a qualitative difference between yards rushing and number of completions.)

Monday, November 11, 2002

What if someone steals your thumb? I really love the Atlantic magazine -- it's one of the few I subscribe to. The September issue had an article with a number of wonderful sidebars on security. One section dealt with the current facination with biometrics:
Biometrics—"the only way to prevent identity fraud," according to the former senator Alan K. Simpson, of Wyoming—identifies people by precisely measuring their physical characteristics and matching them up against a database. The photographs on driver's licenses are an early example, but engineers have developed many high-tech alternatives, some of them already mentioned: fingerprint readers, voiceprint recorders, retina or iris scanners, face-recognition devices, hand-geometry assayers, even signature-geometry analyzers, which register pen pressure and writing speed as well as the appearance of a signature.

* * *


Smart cards that store non-biometric data have been routinely cracked in the past, often with inexpensive oscilloscope-like devices that detect and interpret the timing and power fluctuations as the chip operates. An even cheaper method, announced in May by two Cambridge security researchers, requires only a bright light, a standard microscope, and duct tape. Biometric ID cards are equally vulnerable. Indeed, as a recent National Research Council study points out, the extra security supposedly provided by biometric ID cards will raise the economic incentive to counterfeit or steal them, with potentially disastrous consequences to the victims. "Okay, somebody steals your thumbprint," Schneier says. "Because we've centralized all the functions, the thief can tap your credit, open your medical records, start your car, any number of things. Now what do you do? With a credit card, the bank can issue you a new card with a new number. But this is your thumb—you can't get a new one."
I heartily recommend the full article and the sidebars. (Oh, what the heck I'll put in this long quote from one of the sidebars:
Surprise, when it happens to a government, is likely to be a complicated, diffuse, bureaucratic thing ... It includes gaps in intelligence, but also intelligence that, like a string of pearls too precious to wear, is too sensitive to give to those who need it. It includes the alarm that fails to work, but also the alarm that has gone off so often it has been disconnected. It includes the unalert watchman, but also the one who knows he'll be chewed out by his superior if he gets higher authority out of bed. It includes the contingencies that occur to no one, but also those that everyone assumes somebody else is taking care of. It includes straightforward procrastination, but also decisions protracted by internal disagreement. It includes, in addition, the inability of individual human beings to rise to the occasion until they are sure it is the occasion—which is usually too late. (Unlike movies, real life provides no musical background to tip us off to the climax.) Finally, as at Pearl Harbor, surprise may include some measure of genuine novelty introduced by the enemy, and possibly some sheer bad luck.)

Like I said, read the whole thing.

Sunday, November 10, 2002

War Plans? My wife said she heard that the NY Times published a leaked copy of the Iraq War Plans in today's paper. When I checked on-line I didn't see anything about this. Does anyone know anything about this. I also skimmed Instapundit and didn't see anything. Let me go check the Judds or Kevin or one of the other blogs.

Update. Not even Sgt. Stryker has anything about it. Maybe there was nothing.

More. Here it is.
Cover Watch. Newsweek magazine wins hands down. Top Gun In fact this cover is so cool, I'm planning on going to the newsstand just to buy a copy for the cover. Time has something similar, but the Time cover seems sort of smirky. The Time caption is "How they aced their midterms."

Curiously, and I know I don't normally throw U.S News and World Report into the mix, however it has a cover story on Menopause -- very surprising to go so soft against the backdrop of such a major news story.


Friday, November 08, 2002

Clarification. Howard Bashman has this succinct note up correcting two mistakes in a NOW press release:
The article quotes the president of the National Organization for Women as saying, "Roe v. Wade hangs by a single vote. Tipping the balance of the Supreme Court with one more extremist justice would ensure the loss of abortion rights for generations." That quotation contains two serious errors by my count. First, the vote on today's U.S. Supreme Court to uphold Roe v. Wade is 6-3, not 5-4. (When Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg replaced Justice Byron R. White on the Court, the vote to uphold Roe increased from 5-4 to 6-3.) Second, if Roe v. Wade were overruled by the U.S. Supreme Court -- a prospect that is not especially likely -- abortion would not thereupon become illegal throughout the United States. Rather, each State would then be entitled to enact laws regulating the availability of abortion, or not, as it saw fit.
The second point is one I tried making below. Please see also, Orrin Judd's comments in response to that post.

Thursday, November 07, 2002

Idiots of the World, Untie! I was disappointed that Amendment 2 to the New Mexico Constitution did not pass. This would have removed the language from the state constitution prohibiting idiots from voting. Of course, this just makes me all the more happy to live in Virginia where we not only have an idiot for Senator, but for Governor as well.

BTW, I have to say that the NM Secretary of State, Rebecca Vigil-Giron, is the most atypically beautiful SOS I have ever come across.
Cumulative Power Ratings. Continuing my attempt at combining the main media power rankings from these site: ESPN, CNNSI, TSN, War Room, Sports Central, Sagarin (USA Today), CBS, and AP indexes or ratings into one cumulative list. It's interesting to me to see the clusters you get from this. Also, if I were to really play with this, I'd include standard deviations -- the AP list is the most divergent -- in the meantime, I'm including team highs and lows from the different lists.

No. Team Cu. Hi Lo
1 Packers 1.38 1 3
2 Broncos 2.5 1 5
3 Eagles 3.5 1 6
4 49ers 4.5 4 6
5 Saints 4.88 3 11
6 Bucs 5.88 2 8
7 Steelers 8 6 10
8 Chargers 8.38 5 15
9 Falcons 10 9 11
10 Patriots 10.13 5 14
11 Dolphins 10.63 7 16
12 Chiefs 12.38 7 17
13 Raiders 13.13 9 16
14 Bills 13.25 10 18
15 Rams 13.88 7 19
16 Titans 17.13 12 24
17 Giants 17.5 14 23
18 Redskins 18.5 15 22
19 Colts 19.38 16 24
20 Browns 19.63 17 22
21 Ravens 20.13 16 24
22 Cardinals 21.38 17 30
23 Jets 22.5 16 27
24 Jaguars 23.63 21 26
25 Panthers 25.25 23 29
26 Lions 25.5 22 27
27 Cowboys 26.88 25 29
28 Bears 28 25 30
29 Seahawks.... 28 26 30
30 Vikings 29.13_ 28 30
31 Texans 31.13 31 32
32.. Bengals 31.88 31__ 32__

[A Thousand Thank Yous to Mark Byron for the tablesizer macro.]
Natch! (Actually, I was hoping for James Madison.)

Good bye Dick. Eddie Eddie's Evil Twin
Ben D has a short note up about Dick Gephardt stepping down as Minority Leader. Like Ben, I lack a visceral hatred of Dick -- I think it's because he is an effective representative of the loyal opposition. He fleshes out that concept, like a Henry Hyde does for the Republicans. He can be partisan and infuriating -- but when push comes to shove, he'll try to make a policy work, even if he hasn't supported it. This is opposed to Tom Daschle, who is clearly Eddie Haskell's evil twin.

I'm not sure whether Dick was very effective as minority leader -- he didn't gum things up as much as Daschle did -- but I think he would've been effective as Speaker of the House. On the other hand, Daschle is more effective being in a sniping minority leader type position.

Update. Martin Frost is talking about running. I was very impressed with him in the Iraq debates. Moreover, he's right to be "very uneasy about the party moving sharply to the left" under Nancy Pelosi, which would guarantee the Democrats becoming a "permanent minority party."

Wednesday, November 06, 2002

Good-bye Roe? One theme I'm seeing and hearing in the comments of those whining about the Democrats losses yesterday is "Say good bye Roe v Wade. . . . Now, let the bloodletting begin." (expressed by Paul A'Barge here).

Lay aside the unintended irony that an end to abortion on demand = bloodletting. Lay aside the fact that the GOP tend to back navel-gazing judges like Souter and Kennedy ("At the heart of liberty is the right to define one's own concept of existence, of meaning, of the universe, and of the mystery of human life." Planned Parenthood of Southeastern Pa. v. Casey (91-744), 505 U.S. 833 (1992)). Lay aside the impact that stare decisis will have on the Court. Let's imagine what would happen if Roe were over-ruled.

I know, the next day old men who look like Jesse Helms and William Rehnquist will be roaming the streets looking for women to force them to bear children. Robert Bork will be lurking around alleys with coat-hangers stuffed inside his coat. Of course, it won't be long before a woman will have to make the daily walk to markets with picture signs because women are no longer allowed to read. It won't be long before the monthy ritual of praying that the Commander will make her pregnant.

Really?

No. At worst, if you believe in the unfettered access to abortion on demand is that now politicians will actually have to take a stand. If they say they are opposed to abortion, they will have to come up with a plan to curtail, regulate, or ban it -- in their jurisdiction only. This last element -- that it will be a local or statewide ban is something pro-abortion conservatives or constitutionalists will be insisting on -- asking, as they have for so many other issues -- where does the Constitution give Congress the power to regulate abortion? And the Rehnquist conservatives on the Court, if they are consistent, will follow the line of cases they've cautiously began establishing and strike down Congressional restrictions. (That is, if Congress were to get a majority in both Houses to proceed with a regulation, something I'm dubious of).

So what does that mean? It means some states, perhaps Louisiana and Utah, will sharply curtail abortion. Some others may end third term abortions and place limits on second term abortion -- in other words, it will be pretty much like the legal limits employed by France in those states. In the other states -- including New York and California, the most liberal (meaning non-existent) abortion laws in the world will go unchanged.

What it would mean is that the fiction that the U.S. Constitution guarantees the right to an abortion will itself be extinguished.
Votes Count. In South Dakota, they are now reporting all 844 precincts in and the margin of victory for Johnson is 528 votes -- less than one voter per precinct.

I don't know if this includes the absentee ballots. Oh, and the Libertarians gave their 3,071 to Kurt Evans.


______________________ TOTAL _ PERCENT _ PRECINCTS ___ TOTAL
_______________________VOTES _ OF VOTE _ REPORTING _ PRECINCTS

U S SENATE
(L) EVANS KURT _______ 3071 _____ 1 _______844 ____ 844
(D) JOHNSON TIM _____167477 ____ 50 ______ 844 ____ 844
(R) THUNE JOHN ______166949 ____ 49 _______844 ____ 844

Tuesday, November 05, 2002

Out of Ashes. It looks like Connie Morella is going to lose her House seat. If I were a Democrat, I don't know that this is necessarily good news -- she could go after Barbara Mikulski's seat in the Senate in 2004. That would be interesting...
We Did It!!!! I'm feeling very celebratory -- we beat the tax increase. And my prediction about Sununu losing is off the mark. It looks like the Leahy Lynch mob is out of business.
Not Good. What I'm hearing about the elections so far is not good -- people voting in Maryland say the system has become more computerized and technological - and less mechanical. This gives the appearance of multiple possibilities for fraud. Voting machines in Montgomery County, a Democratic stronghold, have a header that say the voter is casting a "Democratic" vote.

I'm sure we'll be hearing stories about failures, mistakes and allegations of fraud and intimidation. I've already indicated I think that if the Maryland Governor's race is close, you're going to see votes coming in for KKT that will reek of 3 week-old crab cakes.

Not good -- this is not good. More later.

Update -- at just about 11 EST, Ehrlich is about 80,000 votes ahead -- too much for even the Democratic machine to overcome. I think if it narrows to about 8-10,000 votes, they may pull something, but this may be too much.

Monday, November 04, 2002

Shakin' All Over. Dang -- lots of big aftershocks in Alaska following the 7.9 earthquake yesterday. Seven to be precise. I was supposed to go to Alaska last month but begged off the trip. I heard about the 6.7 quake from the folks who went and was glad I missed it. I've been in two 7+ earthquakes in my life and don't want to experience another one. The last one in Alaska was a 4.7.

Remember a "magnitude 6.7 earthquake releases over 900 times the energy of a 4.7 earthquake - or it takes about 900 magnitude 4.7 earthquakes to equal the energy released in a single 6.7 earthquake!" From this website.

Update -- still quite a few aftershocks, including at least two over 5.0.
My predictions. Here are my predictions for tomorrow [Beware, I picked three losers this weekend: Oakland Raiders, Notre Dame, and the Asylum Idiots.]:

Senate: 51 Rep, 48 Dem, 1 Ind
House: 230 Rep, 204 Dem, 1 Ind
Governors: 27 Dem, 23 Rep, 0 Ind
Predictions: (1) Hutchinson, Cleland, Sununu, Carnahan and Mondale lose. (2) Thune wins (3) Landrieu gets 53% and avoids the Pearl Harbor run-off. (3) In a replay of 1994, KKT "wins" Maryland with an amazing delivery of votes from Baltimore. (4) Linda Lingle wins Hawai'i governorship. (5) George Gekas, Helen Bentley, Felix Grucci and Connie Morella all win close races to lead the GOP resurgence (6) James Traficant gets 30% of the vote and comes in second.

Update Did I say Traficant would get Thirty percent -- are you sure? I thought I said Thirteen percent. ;-P

Sunday, November 03, 2002

Election 2k2 - the Warner Scenario The Domenecher is soliciting predictions for the November elections -- I'll be sending those along later tonight. In the meantime, here's my very far-fetched prediction (with appropriate credit to Alan Drury and Christopher Buckley).

We'll Call this the Warner Scenario (or, if you want to be dramatic, the Warner Nightmare).

Monday Evening, November 4, 2002 -- after a little Monkey Business with Elizabeth Rae Fox, the regular mistress of Sen. Edward Kennedy, Senator John Warner, or Foghorn Clegghorn, as voters in the Great Dominion affectionately call him, starts to seize and turn blue. It seems that he has a chicken-bone lodged in his throat. He flails and then collapses. Ms. Fox, not sure what to do, calls Senator Kennedy. Kennedy, who will claim much later that he thought Fox had already called for an ambulance, will advise her to do nothing -- she should secure a neck brace and appear in public as much as possible over the next day. Preferable wearing a sporty, yet conservative blue blazer.

For the next 12 to 18 hours, Kennedy is the only one ("other than that bimbo") who knows that the elegant John Warner's splendid senatorial body is cooling and he springs into action. The Democrats don't have anyone on the ballot in Virginia opposing Warner. Perhaps he can arrange a little New Jersey justice and have the ballot reconstructed to put a Democrat on the ballot. Does he have any kin currently living in Virgina? Or have those that do moved north for a few months to help Bobby's brat, KKT? Going to court might tip off the Republicans that they have a stiff on the ballot, not that they didn't know that already. He thinks the courts in Virginia aren't as reliable as those in Virginia -- they actually follow the written law down there -- not like during the 50's when he was in school and pop could make arrangements. The most votes win, so he just needs to call some friends and get a quick write-in campaign going.

Tuesday Morning -- very early, November 5, 2002 -- Kennedy gets off the telephone with another Virginia fundraiser -- why do they all go to bed so early -- it's only 3 a.m.? They all indicate they'll make calls and get out a write-in vote. He thinks he should've proposed a candidate -- he just can't remember anyone down there -- other than the fundraisers and they make too much to want to go into politics. They don't know what a babe magnet power is. Anyway, all he needs is a few hundred voters picking one good Democrat. Hell, probably all he needs is a few dozen writing in the same name to win. Besides, don't we have the Governor down there?

Tuesday Morning -- sunrise, November 5, 2002 The polls in Virginia are open. John Warner's maid let's herself in, quietly and soon realizes he's sleeping off another drunk on the floor. At least this keeps him from pawing at her, she thinks and goes to work in another room.

Tuesday Morning -- 9:30 a.m. November 5, 2002 Calls are being made across Virginia -- in Richmond, telling friends to write in Doug Wilder; in Northern Virginia, telling friends to write in Chuck Robb "or that Volvo dealer"; in Southside, telling them to write in one of the Byrds; in Charlottesville, it's Larry Sabato; at the Beach, the fundraiser likes Alan Diamondstein; in the Valley they're writing in Ralph Sampson. Meanwhile, Warner's driver is cooling his heels, waiting to drive his boss to Richmond for the big victory party.

Tuesday Morning -- late, November 5, 2002 The Warner staff discover he's dead. Someone, probably a mole, actually tips someone off at the state Republican party of this fact. Since the governor is a Democrat, he gets to appoint if they don't do something. (Just like the Wellstone Democrats, no one much cares about the former Senator -- now just a cold corpse). Perhaps we can pull a Laufenberg --you mean Lautenberg, Laufenberg was a Redskins quarterback -- whatever.

Tuesday afternoon -- November 5, 2002 "The GOP efforts to substitute perinnial Republican J. Marshall Coleman on today's ballot was rejected this afternoon by a court in Richmond. In other news, Senator John Warner, the seventh husband of Elizabeth Taylor, passed away today . . ."

Tuesday, November 5, 2002, 7:00 p.m. "Most of the polls are closing now in Virginia amidst a flurry of lawsuits, at last count 31 lawsuits had been filed from Arlington to Abington. By various court orders, the polls in Manassas, Hampton, Lee County, Suffolk, and Danville are all still open. . . ."

Tuesday late - November 5, 2002 ". . .thank you, Peter Dan, you're right, it does look like the revenge of the 'Cocoon Generatation:' Walter Monday and Frank Laufenberg are both winners and in Virginia the early write-in candidates to take the seat of John Warner are Harry F. Byrd, Jr., James Madison, Thomas Jefferson, and George Washington. With the Senate appearing to be evenly split, the winner of this race could decide who controls . . ."

Thursday afternoon -- November 7, 2002 "Who is the hell is Nancy Spannaus?"
Cover Watch. Think young! Newsweek uses Olie, Arthur, Blue, et al. to attract the eye of the little shopper. Buy it Mommeee. Think younger! Time takes you inside the womb. If I'm the one making the purchase, I'd go with Time.